Leaving the hospital the day after our daughter was born is a memory I will never forget. I remember thinking how is it possible that a hospital would release a one day old infant to a couple of young adults in their twenties who lack any experience with taking care of a baby! We did not know everything and were far from it. Yet, somehow that baby daughter is alive and thriving today, the mother of our 2 grandchildren.
Some describe it as a leap of faith. It’s that moment where standing on the edge of the cliff looking down into the vast unknown that we decide to go for it despite that nagging fear pulling at every fiber of our soul. It’s the decision made not so much on a careful analysis of risk and reward, but on gut instinct that there will be a better tomorrow if we charge ahead.
In his book “The Power of One More”, Ed Mylett says “To live a full life, there must be several times when you suspend the necessity of needing to know everything before you act.”
What decision are you putting off because you feel like you need to know everything before you act? What action are you avoiding for the same reason? Will you ever know everything? Will acting now without full knowledge lead to better understanding?
It’s painful to coach someone who suffers from a need to know everything in advance belief system. The sheer agony of having to come up with more questions instead of just jumping in and getting started is hard to watch. Fear of the unknown is perhaps the most debilitating of forces.
So how do you overcome this powerful force that shackles you to the ground when you are trying to learn to fly? Here are a few suggestions.
Consider how you have successfully learned in the past. If you have had the opportunity up close to observe children grow and develop it’s evident that they learn by doing. Initially there is lots of failure. They do get lots of encouragement. They also observe others performing successfully. It’s never a question of if, rather a question of when. They keep trying until they figure it out.
Consider the consequences of short-term failure. Often the consequences aren’t that bad. If the only things to lose are our ego and pride, press forward. Sometimes we let our concerns about what other people will think dictate whether we will try something new. The truth is, most people are not that focused or concerned about what you do.
Focus on the prize. What do you stand to gain by trying, learning, and perfecting this new initiative? If it works out perfectly, what’s it worth to you? Ultimately courage will be found if the reward is significant enough.
Approach everything new as a student. Give yourself permission to learn through failure and making mistakes. Understand that every mistake eliminates one way that doesn’t work. Eliminate enough things that don’t work and you are bound to find what does work.
Ed Mylett says “A need to know everything in advance belief system will not serve you well throughout your life.” Your life will not be what it could be if you allow yourself to fall victim to this type of thinking. Cultivate an exciting life by seeking new experiences and new challenges that push you out of your comfort zone.
One of the ways to reach more of your full potential is by identifying and committing to try new things. Having a success coach to assist you can be a valuable ingredient. Reach out and let’s have a discussion about how a coach can help you overcome a need to know everything in advance.